Pet Hates…

Hmm...

 

Biggest pet hates, gets to me every time I drive on a bloody motorway.

 

1.       The damn selfish gits who use the middle lane as a cruising lane. There is only one cruising lane on British motorways, the rest are there to serve as overtaking lanes. So sticking yourself in the middle lane and refusing to move, should be punishable by death ray.

2.       The useless bleeder who sits behind you and thinks he is important and has a big ostentatious POS car and can flash his headlights in your mirror. Just for your information, these are fitted to cars these days to light up the direction of travel and not, as some seem to think, a form of Aldis Lamp for the sending of Morse code messages. If he wishes to send some form of message, then before doing so again, I suggest he learns Morse code as the random flashes that usually appear from these clowns is unintelligible. And, yes I can read Morse, so if you learn it properly, then at least I will understand you, but don’t be alarmed, if once you’ve passed me I send the following message:-

-.-- --- ..- / -.-. --- -- .--. .-.. . - . / -.. .. -.-. -.- / .... . .- -.

3.       Finally, another hate of mine are the ignorant lane hoppers. Just to clarify, the indicator signal lamp was invented in 1908 and was patented in 1938. It has been fitted as standard to all road going vehicles since the early 1950's. So since then, you have had no excuse for not using it when you decide to swap lane or turn a bloody corner, so either use it or learn to walk.

 

Now to all those who fit in the above categories, I have one bit of advice for you.

For god’s sake, throw your car away and get off the planet. You are a nuisance.

It stuns me at times, how many people, who have a piece of plastic (or piece of paper) which then gives them total control of something weighing in excess of a ton and capable of travelling at warp speed, do not actually know the first thing about driving. They break every legal aspect of driving, they break every common sense aspect of driving, and they think the road is theirs and theirs alone. Most of these drivers at least have the courtesy to have a symbol on their car to warn other road users that they are a complete and utter imbecile. If you look below, you will be able to memorise these symbols for later, so the next time you take to the highway, you can at least identify said imbeciles.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Remember them well, fellow drivers, as this could, one day, save your life. Better still, if your vehicle has the latest laser technology fitted, please feel free to take out any vehicle displaying these motifs.

 

Mart.